I’m not so presumptuous as to think I have the key to happiness. That’s why I’ve titled this “Jo’s Five Steps to HAPPINESS”. These are MY tips on how I become a happier (and incidentally more productive) version of myself. If they help anyone reading this I’m glad! Please let me know if they do – or how YOU become happier. 🙂
1. WANT to be happy
This is the biggest one – probably why it’s first 😛 I don’t think a person can be happy if they don’t want to be. I’m not a glass half full or empty person. I’m a fill-the-glass-up-yourself person. My attitude dictates my whole day. Because I choose to have a bright outlook on life the things I can’t control don’t affect me as much as they would.
2. Cure your LONELINESS
I’ve only had mild cases of loneliness myself: house sitting alone; staying at home alone in a house usually full of people; not being able to see the one person I desired.
However even just a slice of this “loneliness” feeling has terrified me. I shudder to think at how I’d react with a longer or stronger bout, but I know it’s out there. And I know I’ll probably experience it again in the many years of my life to come.
I also know it’s one of the hardest things to “cure”. Usually it takes an adjustment – getting used to the absence of people, whether you’ve moved out of home for the first time or your partner has left you. Loneliness isn’t something you can get rid of in two seconds. But I do believe there are things you can do to help dull it’s ache. Personally I’d put on an episode of Friends or try to loose myself in writing or call a friend. It’s kind of hit and miss because something you might love to do when you aren’t lonely is awful to do with the feeling.
It takes time, but once loneliness is gone, it’s much easier to be happier and whole.
3. Have a GOAL or find a PASSION
Do something in life! Going about the motions and not having a spark in any aspect of life can be extremely dull. I’d find it hard to get out of bed in the morning if I wasn’t striving for something. It could be a career goal, or savings goal, passion for volunteering, or my own passion and goal: to publish a book. The ideas and opportunities are endless.
4. Be KIND to yourself and others
I’ve always been a kind hearted person. I like to give people to benefit of the doubt and not think of everyone as my enemy. I put myself in their shoes and try to act with a level head and kind heart. There is too much anger and judgement in the world already without us adding to it – why not try to lessen it?
The same old saying works: treat others how you’d like to be treated. Think back to when another person was unfairly angry or presumptuous with you; a customer who wouldn’t let you explain or perhaps a friend jumped to the wrong conclusion. If you’d have rather them approached the situation calmer and without the negativity, then start the trend with yourself. Be kind in your everyday life.
Being kind to myself is something I’m still learning. It’s tied to self esteem and can really add gloom if you don’t treat yourself with respect. I used to berate myself for not doing the littlest things; I’d call myself lazy if I didn’t make my bed. But it’s just more negative thinking and is detrimental to my mental health if I start to believe these things.
Learn other ways you respond to forms of positive encouragement and give yourself a break when needed. Nobody is perfect, and we shouldn’t expect anyone to be.
5. Always be WORKING on yourself
This is one I’ve also learnt recently. It’s kind of like having a goal, but I think of it on a smaller scale. It’s boring when things are stagnant, but exciting when they are challenging, right? Look at the things in your life where have plateaued and find ways to work on them.
For example I am a full time accounts clerk. I enjoy my job, but like any occupation there are boring parts to accompany the interesting. When I have to do anything I consider boring, I jig one of my legs up and down for ten minutes, then more onto the next one. That small action keeps my mind more focused and it contributes to my healthy body goal. Or when I’m balancing money, I’ll add things up in my head instead of using a calculator. It may take a few more seconds to push through and think about it, but the more I do it the faster I become, and the sharper my mind is.
Finding little things like those in your daily life can help bring out the fun in monotonous tasks.
I hope these have helped anyone reading! Let me know! And if YOU have any tips to become happier let me know those too!! 🙂